The Truth Behind Adulthood

Who ever gives you the truth about being an adult? I know sometimes our parents may try and warn us what it will be like. They give us those comments about being a parent and paying our own bills. But sometimes even parents don't want to scare us about being an adult. (Or else they will never get us out of the house). But this isn't about our parents, and this isn't about getting out of the house. This is the dirty truth about being an adult. The truth that for me, sometimes is embarrassing. But this is the truth for the others to relate with. Or for others, this may remind you that you aren't alone in the struggle of being an adult...

I made the decision to move out young. Trust me, I've got my fair lectures of "You shouldn't have moved out at 18!", but I also got many, "No way you moved out? Good for you!" Being an adult starts early for some, and late for others. Some live with their parents until they are in their late 20's and some are fighting for themselves starting at the age of 14. Everyone goes through adulthood differently. But let me share some situations with you that some just simply can't bring up. Whether it be out of fear or embarrassment, or even pride. I struggle on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis. Yes I live with another person, but we both have responsibilities that we had prior to living together. We both have bills, debts, or expectations that take up time and money. We both work jobs that can have good days and bad days. We both want time for ourselves or time to spend with our family, so how do we do all these things while maintaining our living? The answer to that, is that we don't always succeed. Times get tough for us as a couple and as individuals. I work part-time (closer to full-time) and go to school part-time. He works full-time (more like 3 times full-time). We have our regular bills like rent, utilities, food, gas, insurance, phones, etc. There are weeks where we need to take off a couple days. Funerals, birthdays, family gatherings, or holidays. What's hard about this, is that we fall behind while trying to enjoy our time. Having vacations and time off is amazing, while you're living in the present. Then, when reality strikes, you realize, "I didn't work enough and now my paycheck is half of what I normally get." Then you panic, you look for money elsewhere, you sells things, or you piggy bank off someone who can loan you some cash or borrow you some money to get by. Then, a lot of times unexpected things come into play like speeding tickets, or textbook costs, or needing new tires. In my situation, times have gotten to be rough in a few situations. I have had to use the government for things like an EBT card for help with groceries. I have had to go to see my school counselor to ask for help with loans and textbooks. I have had to ask for money from my friends and family and try to figure out how I would pay them back. I also have gone the route of trying to sell things like furniture, clothes, and other items just to pull together some extra cash for necessities. We don't have degrees in anything yet to go get other jobs. So we work in our current jobs the best we can and scrap to get by sometimes. Other times, when bills fall in certain areas, we have left over money. HOW EXCITING! However, being an adult means thinking of saving it. Saving it for future situations like the last. Saving it for new tires, new shoes, new clothes. Or even saving it knowing that you will need toilet paper and dishwasher detergent in a couple days. Being an adult means trying to make better decisions with your time and money. You have to work, sleep, and run errands as an adult. Rarely do you get time to go to a football game, go to a party, club, bowling alley, or even a movie. That's why doing something like that is INCREDIBLY fun as an adult because it is then considered out of the norm. Being an adult means knowing yourself. And at a young age its hard to know yourself. Its hard to try and finish establishing who you are as a person while trying to live life with others. Being an adult means fighting, and apologizing. Whether it be with a loved one or a parent. Being an adult means being able to put aside your pride and acknowledge that you may be in the wrong. Being an adult means you have to make the decision to stay in and do laundry over going to the movies with friends. Being an adult sometimes just SUCKS. It's easier living with parents and having them cook and clean for you. Driving the cars they bought you and only needing to worry about going to school and football games on Friday nights. It seems easy not having children and never understanding what it's like to be a parent. So I can't imagine what our parents deal with every day of their lives. Adulthood has ugly parts, but it also can be beautiful. Being an adult means we are content with who we are and where we are in life. Being an adult means having your life in a place where it tends to be consistent and safe. Being an adult means being with other people and learning from them to better yourself. Adulthood brings passion, anger, happiness, wisdom, and experience. Not all adulthood is bad. Each stressor that comes along makes us stronger human beings. Sometimes being an adult means losing people. Losing people you love, or grew up with. Losing parents or in the hard and rare case, a child. A "young" adult is the position I am in, or that most of us are in. We have many more hoops to jump through as we age. But through it all if I have any advice, don't be scared to ask for help. Help from friends or family. Help from the government. Help from counselors or teachers. Even help from shelters or communities. Many times, these can even be kept anonymous so that no one has to know you were there. Adulthood is inevitable. But be willing to take it by the horns and shake it around until it goes dizzy. Take charge of your life and remind yourself, it all gets better, and you are not alone.